Bow Tie Kreative Writing System
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Rules / voice

VOI-012 Heuristic layer: document

Avoid institutional self-centering

IF WE/OUR language displaces the reader’s need or action, THEN rewrite around the reader or subject ELSE retain clear author responsibility.

Why the rule exists

Reader-centered prose is not the same as hiding who is responsible.

Condition

The rule fires when this evaluates true. Paths marked below must be present in the fact base; the engine reports the rest rather than guessing them.

  • ALL
    • document.first_person_plural_rate eq "high"
    • document.reader_need_displaced eq true

Facts this rule reads

PathSource
document.first_person_plural_rate You supply it
document.reader_need_displaced You supply it

Then

  1. reframe — target document

Else

  1. retain — target current_text, No triggering condition is present.

LAKA

Smallest sufficient intervention
Yes
Primary axes

Sources

  • Google Developer Documentation Style Guide — Google link
    Clear, consistent, audience-directed technical documentation.
  • Microsoft Writing Style Guide — Microsoft link
    Warm, clear, concise, helpful technical communication.
  • Principles of plain language — Digital.gov / U.S. General Services Administration link
    Design content so the intended audience can find, understand, and use it.
The raw rule record

Verbatim from 12-voice-rhythm-rules.json. Also available at /v1/rules/VOI-012.

{
  "id": "VOI-012",
  "name": "Avoid institutional self-centering",
  "domain": "voice",
  "layer": "document",
  "strength": "heuristic",
  "human_logic": "IF WE/OUR language displaces the reader’s need or action, THEN rewrite around the reader or subject ELSE retain clear author responsibility.",
  "when": {
    "all": [
      {
        "path": "document.first_person_plural_rate",
        "operator": "eq",
        "value": "high"
      },
      {
        "path": "document.reader_need_displaced",
        "operator": "eq",
        "value": true
      }
    ]
  },
  "then": [
    {
      "action": "reframe",
      "target": "document",
      "center": "reader_need_or_subject"
    }
  ],
  "else": [
    {
      "action": "retain",
      "target": "current_text",
      "reason": "No triggering condition is present."
    }
  ],
  "unless": [],
  "because": "Reader-centered prose is not the same as hiding who is responsible.",
  "diagnostics": [],
  "examples": {},
  "source_ids": [
    "WEB-003",
    "WEB-004",
    "WEB-002"
  ],
  "laka": {
    "smallest_sufficient_intervention": true,
    "primary_axes": [
      "scope",
      "depth",
      "magnitude",
      "reversibility"
    ]
  }
}

Other voice rules

  1. VOI-001 Declare voice before polishing IF a document lacks a voice profile, THEN define relationship, formality, energy, warmth, confidence, and permitted vocabulary ELSE use the profile. Context default
  2. VOI-002 Tone responds to reader state IF reader emotion changes, THEN adjust directness, warmth, pace, and reassurance without changing facts ELSE maintain baseline tone. Context default
  3. VOI-003 Address the reader directly in instructions IF the reader performs the action, THEN use an imperative or YOU; do not call the reader THE USER ELSE name the actual actor. Context default
  4. VOI-010 Metaphor must preserve the model IF a metaphor explains a mechanism, THEN map its relevant correspondences and state its boundary when overextension would mislead ELSE use it only decoratively. Hard constraint
  5. VOI-011 Calibrate confidence to evidence IF wording expresses certainty, THEN match modal strength to evidence and uncertainty ELSE retain. Hard constraint